tetsuo777

...

november 7th, 2024

7:33 pm

currently listening to: space oddity by david bowie

maybe its futile, to sit here and type out these little paragraphs, considering this is the 3rd session, maybe this will be the last.

today was the first day i put the belt around my neck, for about 5 minutes i practiced the motions, it did have a strangle on me for a minute.

i waste all my days sitting in my room, or at some degrading job that serves no purpose, the suburbs kill. loneliness kills.

how many more days can i hope that it will get better? that somehow my situation will magically change for the better? in this life i wanted love, i wanted to feel the embrace of someone else, to live a life that was interesting and held significance. all i have been reduced to is...

camus...villeneuve...moore...the people i looked up to had so much vigor in their life, they had what i don't. im nothing special. im nothing great.

i think i am going to kill myself tonight, i dont know if i will make it to tommorrow.

thank you for reading.